


“He’s so pretty I think I’m gonna faint.”

by sign_from_god_complex



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Hopeful Ending, M/M, Mutual Pining, Nonbinary Logic | Logan Sanders, Smart Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Toxic Friendships, Unsympathetic Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Unsympathetic Morality | Patton Sanders, which isn't a tag yet but absolutely should be, who uses neopronouns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-11
Updated: 2020-02-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:56:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22265980
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sign_from_god_complex/pseuds/sign_from_god_complex
Summary: Roman hadn’t realised just how much his friends disliked his crush… or how much they dislikedhim.
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Deceit Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders & Deceit Sanders, One-Sided Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 10
Kudos: 191





	“He’s so pretty I think I’m gonna faint.”

**Author's Note:**

> **Warnings:** Unsympathetic Patton and Virgil, toxic friendships, brief unwanted flirting, implied fat-shaming. If you don’t want to read the fat-shaming, skip the paragraph starting with “Dee picked a cookie up off his lunch tray”, you won’t miss anything crucial.
> 
>  **A/N:** I know this one is very outside the realm of what I’d normally write. I want it to be clear that I would never think the sides to be anything like what Patton and Virgil are like in this fic, I was simply in a Mood and this is what I felt like writing.

“He’s so pretty I think I’m gonna faint.”

Roman gazed across the cafeteria with verifiable hearts in his eyes, chin resting in his hand like a teenage girl in a romance novel. He let out a wistful sigh, watching Dee laugh at something Logan had said, delighting in the way his whole face scrunched up. He looked so _happy_.

Roman wondered what it would be like to be that happy.

Happy was easy in theory, sure. Roman was happy when he got a part in the musical, he was happy when he got a good grade or when he perfected his eyeliner just so. But… there was always some sort of… catch.

Roman was allowed to be happy about the musical but not _too_ happy; his friends didn’t get his love of the stage and they quickly grew bored of his excited rambling, pushing him to talk about the latest TV show or cute boys instead. He was allowed to be happy about good grades but not in front of the other students; only _nerds_ got so excited about their grades, and Roman wasn’t ~~allowed to be~~ a nerd. He was allowed to be happy about his eyeliner but not in front of his family. Wouldn’t want to be too overtly queer, would he?

He was lucky to have what he had, he shouldn’t be wishing it away, but sometimes he just… longed to not have to worry about what people think so much.

Virgil rolled his eyes, letting out a huff. “Seriously, princey? You’re still pining over that asshole? Move on already!”

Roman blinked, furrowing his brow. That was not the reaction he had been expecting. Sure, his friends had never really seen what _he_ did in the other boy but they’d never been so callous about it before either. Usually, they replied to his lovesick rambling with noncommittal hums or vague agreements but this seemed frustrated, bubbling up and over like Virgil had been holding it back for a while. Roman wondered just how long.

“What?”

Patton sighed—patronising and exasperated—and Roman turned his confused look onto him.

“Look, Ro, we tried to be nice about it, but Dee’s just so…” He screwed up his face in disgust. “Eugh. Him and that nerd do nothing but talk about sci-fi and their grades; they’re so boring! Don’t you think you could do better?”

Patton batted his eyelashes, painting on a smile that made Roman feel sick.

“Better?” he parroted and Patton simply hummed, sliding in closer and placing a hand on his thigh that had Roman jumping.

He stood up abruptly, staring down at Patton in disbelief. Where could this have possibly come from? Patton had never really shown any interest in him before! Sure, he’d been nice, but Patton was always nice; that sugar-sweet way of his became a bit overwhelming after a time, but Roman stuck through it. They were his friends after all, what was he supposed to do?

A quick glance at Virgil revealed no surprise, shock or distaste for Patton’s actions, in fact, he seemed to be barely paying attention, scrolling through his phone with a bored look on his face. He had thought that Virgil would be the kind of person to jump to his rescue, but it appeared he thought wrong. He wondered how well he really knew the two of them after all. They’d seemed to have changed so much since they were happy little kids playing fantasy games in his backyard and Roman wasn’t sure it was for the better.

Only seeming mildly put out by Roman virtually flinching away from his touch, Patton turned those big, blue puppy-dog eyes on him, expecting him to just cave, sit down again and let Patton fuss all over him.

So, instead, Roman picked up his tray. 

“I _don’t_ know what’s going on here but if you want to apologise to me, I’ll be at Dee and Logan’s table,” he stated, tone sounding far more confident than he felt.

Patton’s fake smile dropped into a glower, causing Roman to take a step back in surprise. “Oh, finally worked up the courage to ask out the snake bitch, huh?”

Roman didn’t reply, far too much in a state of shock to do anything other than turn around and make the walk over to Dee’s table. He could hear some of the other students around him commenting on his actions—those close enough to eavesdrop jumping around to their friends on other tables to share the story—but Roman just ignored them. He’d gotten used to the gossip that came with being “popular” a long time ago. Though, that’s not to say he wouldn’t be happy to lose it.

He came to a stop at the side of Logan and Dee’s table, finding himself too self-conscious to speak up as he listened to them debate the merits of selfish actions. It was _horribly_ nerdy and terribly endearing and Roman honestly would have been happy to stand there all day if his arms weren’t beginning to get tired.

He cleared his throat, watching as both of the table’s occupants froze almost immediately, turning to face him “Hi.”

There was a moment of silence—Roman shuffling his feet awkwardly—before Logan decided to speak up.

“Roman Prince.” Xe regarded him with a kind of startled concern, looking slightly caught out, but Roman just gave a nervous smile. “Are you… in need of something?”

Roman let out a breath, somewhere between a laugh and a sigh. “Um, my friends were just being—” he struggled for the right word for a moment before finally settling on—"dicks. They were being dicks. Um… and I was wondering if I would be able to sit here, instead?“

Roman watched as a dark blush rose to Dee’s face, a sort of frightened look in his eye that had him glancing over to Logan for some sort of reassurance. Logan, however, seemed to be poorly concealing a smirk and clearly was not going to be of any assistance to him. Roman tried not to be too concerned about what that look meant.

"I believe that would be acceptable,” xe said, grabbing xyr bag off of the seat beside xem so he had a place to sit down. Roman let out a rush of air as he did so, dropping his tray with a thunk as he watched Dee glare at Logan slightly, though he could tell it held no real animosity.

Dee picked a cookie up off his lunch tray, nibbling on it nervously and Roman couldn’t help but smile. He wondered if he’d be able to get a caramel slice with his lunch tomorrow. They were always his favourites but eventually, he’d given in to the disapproving looks from his friends whenever he’d get one. Somehow, he didn’t think that was going to happen here.

“So,” Logan broke the silence, directing xyr gaze at Dee though cutting xyr eyes over to Roman for a brief moment, “How did you do on your most recent history assessment?”

Dee scrunched up his nose. “Ugh, a B minus. And I actually tried on that one too.”

Roman remembered that project, it was actually a rather creative one—something he greatly appreciated. _“Write a diary entry from the point of view of someone in a particular historical period, including appropriate language and presentation”_. He’d ended up choosing the Elizabethan era, flaunting his fairly in-depth knowledge of Shakespearian language to paint a rather delightful and dramatic love story in 3 or so pages of text. It had been all written out by hand too, utilising the ink pens he’d been given by his mother for his birthday a few years back.

He’d been extremely proud of that piece of work but all his friends had said was, “That’s nice, Roman,” and “Cool,” like he’d been telling them his boring weekend plans and not showing them something he was really pleased with. He’d been put out by that, sure, but… he’d supposed maybe it just hadn’t been as good as he’d thought it was.

“Roman?”

Roman jerked his head up to see both Logan and Dee looking at him in a questioning manner. “Hmm?”

“I was asking how you did on your history assessment,” xe reiterated, spearing a piece of pasta with xyr fork, “I’m under the impression that the two of you are in the same class.”

They were, in fact. The first time Roman had seen Dee sitting in the classroom on that first day of the year, sticking out his tongue in concentration as he sketched something in a notebook, Roman had nearly walked into the doorframe in a gay panicked mess. Of course, nobody else needed to know that.

Roman ducked his head shyly. “Oh, uh, I got an A.”

He was already preparing to dismiss the topic to move onto something else—something more palatable than Roman bragging about his grades—but Dee’s voice interrupted him.

“Roman, that’s _brilliant_.” His face was impressed— _proud_ —and Roman’s eyes widened, hope flooding his chest despite his best efforts to suppress it. “I mean, I worked for weeks straight on that thing and I barely got above average.”

Roman flushed at the praise, trying not to preen too much at the way Dee was looking at him. It made something in his chest flip-flop around and he bit at his lip to try and hide the smile that was taking over his face.

“Yeah, I suppose so,” he laughed, “I, uh- I always liked history, especially the classics. There are just so many incredible stories and the language is _gorgeous_ and it’s always so much queerer than historians claim. I mean-”

Realising he’d been about to start rambling, he cut himself off abruptly, snapping his mouth shut and flushing in embarrassment. _Stupid_. He couldn’t scare them away before he’d even gotten the chance to know them. Logan regarded him with a curious look, seemingly confused by his actions; Dee, however, gave him a sad sort of smile.

“Ro?” Roman met Dee’s eyes—kind and understanding, aware of how it felt to be talked over and ignored and dismissed—and softened slightly. “We would _adore_ hearing about why you love history so much. Wouldn’t we, Logan?”

The look Dee was giving xem was unidentifiable to Roman, however, Logan seemed to know exactly what he was trying to convey as xe raised xyr eyebrows slightly, nodding xyr head. “Of course, yes.”

Roman studied them for a moment, trying to gauge their sincerity.

He’d never believe Dee to be all that malicious. Was he opinionated? Sure. Was he selfish? Almost definitely. He prioritised himself and his wellbeing and the only time Roman had ever seen him go out of his way was for Logan and he _should_ be appalled by that behaviour, except… Roman sort of… admired him for it?

It’d been a long time since he’d done something purely for _himself_. So many of his actions were performative. Restrained. Suppressed. And, with that in mind, he gave one last glance between Logan and Dee and, for the first time in years, Roman let himself _talk_.


End file.
